Daylight saving time is the standard

My answering machine has a sticker with some quick reference instructions on the bottom. However, this sticker doesn't include the one thing I can never remember exactly how to do, but have to do every six months or so: setting the clock.

To set the clock at those special times of year, I have to hold down the "clock" button until the digital voice says the day of the week, then press the button again, and it'll say the hour. Then I have to press either the "up" or "down" button until the voice says the hour I'm trying to set it to. Then I press the "clock" button a couple more times until the voice reads the entire time.

Now, the first problem is that it takes me three or four presses of the "clock" button to remember that I'm supposed to hold it down. But the big problem is that the "up" and "down" buttons aren't labeled as such, and to me, which buttons are assigned to each one is counter-intuitive. The "up" button (labeled "on/off") is on the left of the "clock" button, and the "down" button (labeled "memo/repeat") is on the right. This is the reverse of every other electronic device I own, where the "up" ("forward," "greater than," whatever) button is either above or to the right of the "down" ("reverse," "less than," whatever) button, with or without another button in the middle.

Because of that counter-intuitive placement, I always first try to use the "announce" button as the "up" button, because it's to the right of the "memo/repeat" button. Not only does it not work, but pressing it resets the whole setting the clock procedure, and I have to start again with holding down the "clock" button.

Somehow, when I was fumbling around last night, I managed to confuse the answering machine, and now its display reads "1" instead of "0," even though there are no messages saved. Oh, well, at least now I can pretend people other than telemarketers actually call me.

Maybe I should just move to Arizona, or Indiana. Hawaii's not an option because football games start too early in the day.