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Classic Scripts
The Million-Dollar Rhombus
"And to this day, my mother still has cotton in her ears."
By Jim Ellwanger...Aired April 8, 1995
The Chicago Tribune
"In the end, the vending machine company let me down."
By Jim Ellwanger...Aired April 15, 1995
The Amazing Accountant Man
"Your fingers don't even look big enough to run the adding machine."
By Jim Ellwanger...Aired April 22, 1995
The San Pedro Beach Bums
"Computers never make mistakes."
By Jim Ellwanger...Aired April 29, 1995
Funeral for Nibbles
"Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday...okay, it's been more than three."
By Jim Ellwanger...Aired May 13, 1995
Siggy Gets Revenge
"I thought I felt something tugging at a belt loop, but I guess it's nothing."
By Jim Ellwanger...Aired June 10, 1995
Notice This Legal Notice: The scripts contained on the pages which are linked to from this page are ©1995 by the author named. All rights reserved. Alternate premium available for children under 3.
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Page Last Updated: May 1, 2004